It's always been me.

Same old cycle repeating on different days.
I'm sick of it. I truly am.

All you see is your useless girl, sleeping in d day, going out from evening till late at night. And reach back home to sleep in the day again. You stay up whole night, worry fo' me, ask me to get my bum started on getting things done.

BUT HAVE YOU EVER ASKED YOURSELF?
Just exactly why d hell am I behaving like this?

I bet you didn't, because all you see is that I'm at fault.

It got so bad I'm even too tired trying to speak up fo' myself. Haven't you realized its only in recent weeks have I became like this? I stayed out later and later. Why? Just because I don't wanna fucking face what I do at home anymore.

Not like I completely stopped helping you with d housework. When I did, you didn't even realize. When I don't, dooms day is just tomorrow. Do you know how tiring it is?

After every long day, all I look forward is just to rest properly in my own quiet bedroom. OH LOOK what has it become? EVERYONE starts to go into MY room just because the fucking air-con didn't work in the other room!? What d fuck? I don't even on d air-con every night. Fo' fuck sake, I need my own space please.

I didn't mind you bunking with me, especially when I know why. But imagine the rude shock I had when I reached home to find everyone sleeping all over my floor last night. Not like no one knew I HATE people entering my room. And in order not to wake anyone up, I tried to sleep in the hall.

And guess what? At 6fuckingAM, everyone's alarm started to ring, and like they're d only ones around, they started making a fucking hell lot of noise. I thought, it's okay, I can finally have my bed back to get a proper sleep. And oh? Well done dad. Once I lie down, thanks fo' switching off the air-con. Ya la, it's only you all that needs proper rest what, people like me don't need any.

Especially if I'm such a bum.

Saying so much that I didn't do anything to tidy up my room. EXCUSE ME, not like everyone didn't know that I'm awake late into the night. And HOW TO FUCKING START PACKING IF THERE'S PEOPLE SLEEPING ALL OVER MY FLOOR!? Any slight bit of sound I make, you'll scold d fuck outta me.

I not being selfish. But I would at least expect some courtesy. I don't exactly expect you to ask fo' my permission, but letting me know would be nice enough. But no. You forced me to answer you just why d hell am I doing out so late.

You have no idea how tempted I was just to shout back 'Just because I don't even like coming home anymore.' Just right at the tip of my mouth, then I swallowed everything because I cant only imagine all the hurt that I'l put you thru'. And to prevent you from being hurt, everything falls back on me again.

Well fucking done.

I'm not being mean. I just don't like the lil personal space I have being taken away from me so rudely. And to make it worst, I fucking hate it when all you know is to find fault with me.

Always me, nothing about what's happening around.
Always me, only me.
Always been me, all fucking along.

And I seriously don't know how long can I take this anymore.