Why?

Why uh?
Why can't I sleep?
Why are there so much on my mind?
Why every time something nice happens to me, something else must screw up?
Why EVERY time I'm so damn happy, things MUST happen to take all my mood away?

Problems over problems, before one's down, another raises.
Why?
Me. Because of me.
It's always been me hasn't it?

Abang Ash talked to me.
He said I've changed.
Yea mate, I'm sorry to disappoint.
You, SGC, are all that I'm left with now.

I missed out in my school.
All the practices made me so worn out.
I can't wake up fo' school proper.
I can't concentrate even when I'm in school.

I missed out on my friends out of dance.
I haven't seen them in such a long long time.
I haven't talked to them proper ever since.

I missed out on my friends, my classmates in school.
Because of all the practices, all my packed time table.
I haven't walked to the MRT station with any of my classmates fo' months.
I haven't even gone home with my NEIGHBOR.
Like same block, but no chance to go home together.

I missed out on my family.
That day I sat beside my dad over dinner.
I saw his age on his face.
While I was growing up all these while, he's grown old.
Working damn hard fo' my family, just to provide a proper shelter over our heads.
I haven't talk to my mum proper since I can't even remember.
All I got to say to her was telling if I be home fo' dinner.

My mum is so sweet, d other night she heard me coughing so madly in my room.
She made me my favorite soup to drink.
I almost disappoint her yet again.
Sorry Ash, I had to go home.

Not that I don't love you guys no more.
Time, isn't on my side.

This year, I wish...